Cat Etiquette

One thing that I like to do is write words for funny songs. Hopefully one day there will be tunes to go with these words. Then these little ditties could be sung to entertain small children forever and ever. Until that day, there are only words. Here is one about cats:

Cat Etiquette

You might find it amusing to tease kitty with a string
As she chases it across the floor, you think it’s just the thing.
But cats aren’t here to entertain, and so I urge you pause
Before your hand falls victim to tiny pointy claws.

Chorus:
Sometimes cats get cranky when you play with them too much.
That is quite annoying, since they’re awful nice to touch.
It can make you feel like yelling:
“You’re a mean old such-and-such!!!!!”
Whenever cats get cranky ‘cause you played with them too much.

It might seem enchanting to dress kitty in a cape
No matter how he protests and struggles to escape.
You might think it makes him handsome, that it makes him look quite chic
But the sour look upon his face tells me he thinks you’re a creep.

Chorus.

When you want to pat your kitty, there are some simple rules
For if you do it wrong, your pet will think you’re cruel.
Do not use so much pressure that her eyes start to bug out
This will make your kitty grumpy, and she’ll begin to pout.
If you pat your cat too quickly, all her fur will stand on end,
For in your quest for affection you have upset your friend.

Chorus.